How to Lead Mentee One-on-Ones
As you know, mentors are supposed to meet one-on-one with each mentee during the beginning of the mentoring season . . . ideally within a few weeks of the Story Retreat. We receive a lot of questions from mentors about these meetings . . . “What’s the purpose?” “What do I talk about?”
So, here are some thoughts we’d love for you to share with your mentors as you encourage them to make sure they’re doing their one-on-ones.
At the end of your Story Retreat, virtually all your interaction with your mentees has been in a group. It’s all been kitchen table environments. Now it’s time to have a little back porch time, one-on-one conversation.
To prepare, pray. Seriously. Pray for that individual mentee only! Ask God to show you the one thing you might do to help her . . . show her something about herself that she doesn’t see or hasn’t seriously considered. The one thing could be a blind spot. The one thing could be holding her back from a closer walk with Jesus. The one thing could be keeping her from being a great wife. The one thing could point to her unique calling.
Go back and reread her application for your mentoring group . . . her faith story, bio, obituary, or anything else she had to submit when she applied. Then reread your notes from the faith story she told on the Story Retreat. Look for places where it seems she left out part of her story . . . unexplained gaps in her life. Look for times when she was badly hurt emotionally. Search for words of blame, shame, anger, and pride. Note anything God calls to mind and prayerfully ask God how He might have you approach your mentee with your hunch about what might be holding her back from an all-in walk with Jesus, a better marriage, and being the best version of herself.
Ask questions that can lead to real conversations and help set up a personal mentor-mentee relationship for the rest of the mentoring season. You’re not trying to become her therapist, accountability partner, or her mom. But you are trying to establish an emotional connection with your mentee centered around her greatest felt need, and you’re learning how to pray specifically for her! One of the joys of mentoring is being able to help a mentee have a breakthrough on some issue that’s holding her back from a life following Jesus.
Remember, life change usually happens through the influence of a trusted friend. Mentors have the best shot because they’re ascribed respect from the outset of the mentoring group. But don’t try this alone . . . seek God and only challenge with humility and gentleness. You are first to love your women whether they get it or not.
This article originally appeared on radicalmentoring.com.
Create safe environments where women can bring life's deepest questions.
Known Collective provides everything you need to implement a mentoring process to help women leave comparison at the door and enter a space where they can be real and engage in conversations that matter.